A patient complaining of melancholy consulted Dr. John Abernethy. After an examination the doctor pronounced, "You need amusement. Go and hear the comedian Grimaldi; he will make you laugh, and that will be better for you than any drugs." Said the patient, "I am Grimaldi.

—Bartlett's Book of Anecdotes

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In 1927, when he began his courtship of Dorothy Thompson, Sinclair Lewis followed her across Europe, all the way to Moscow. At Moscow Airport . . . the press was waiting to greet him. "What brought you to Russia?" Lewis was asked.
    "Dorothy," he said.
    "We mean, what's your business here?" the press persisted.
    "Dorothy," said Lewis.
    "You misunderstand. What do you plan to see in Russia?"
    "Dorothy," said Lewis.

—Bartlett's Book of Anecdotes

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Henry Thoreau was languishing in jail after he had refused to pay the Massachusetts poll tax in 1843 [to protest the Mexican-American War]. Ralph Waldo Emerson came to visit him and asked him why he was there. "Waldo, why are you not here?" said Thoreau.

—Bartlett's Book of Anecdotes

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When composer Igor Stravinsky was fifty-seven, he settled in the United States and a year later decided to apply for American citizenship. He made an appointment to see the appropriate official. At his first interview the official asked the famous composer his name. "Stra-vin-sky," he replied, speaking each syllable distinctly. "You could change it, you know," suggested the official.

—Bartlett's Book of Anecdotes

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During the Civil War Abraham Lincoln had occasion at an official reception to refer to the Southerners rather as erring human beings than as foes to be exterminated. An elderly lady, a fiery patriot, rebuked him for speaking kindly of his enemies when he ought to be thinking of destroying them. "Why, madam," said Lincoln, "do I not destroy my enemies when I make them my friends?

—Bartlett's Book of Anecdotes

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Questioned by the British television interviewer David Frost about his approval of a plan of action that entailed such criminal ingredients as burglary and the opening of other people's mail, Richard Nixon replied, "Well, when the president does it, that means it is not illegal.

—Bartlett's Book of Anecdotes

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