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There is nothing as stupid as an educated man if you get him off the thing he was educated in.

—Will Rogers

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A compromise is the art of dividing a cake in such a way that everyone believes he has the biggest piece.

—Ludwig Erhard

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Love wasn't a happening one decided on—to indulge or not, to partake or not. To feel or not. When it came, when it struck, the only decision left to make was how to respond—whether you embraced it, took it in, and made it a part of you, or whether you turned your back and let it die.

—Stephanie Laurens in The Truth About Love 

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My wife's jealousy is getting ridiculous. The other day she looked at my calendar and wanted to know who May was.

—Rodney Dangerfield

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People may not tell you how they feel about you, but they always show you. Pay attention.

—Keri Hilson 

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I just wish the memories would fade. I wish the songs wouldn't bring tears. And, I wish that his name would stop making my heart tremble. I want to forget. I need to forget. I deserve to forget. I have to forget.

—Melissa Brown in Bouquet Toss 

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It's not that I'm afraid to die, I just don't want to be there when it happens.

—Woody Allen

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The upper classes are... a nation's past; the middle class is its future.

—Ayn Rand

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Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the universe together....

—Carl Zwanzig

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When you're eight years old nothing is your business.

—Lenny Bruce

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A hypocrite is a person who--but who isn't?

—Don Marquis

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You can get assent to almost any proposition so long as you are not going to do anything about it.

—Nathaniel Hawthorne

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I never expected to see the day when girls would get sunburned in the places they now do.

—Will Rogers

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I've been loved in life, but all that matters now is that I'm loved by you.

—Abbi Glines in Because of Low

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Acquaintance, n.: A person whom we know well enough to borrow from, but not well enough to lend to.

—Ambrose Bierce

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