I have enough money to last me the rest of my life, unless I buy something.

Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe.

—Jackie Mason

Look to your health; and if you have it, praise God and value it next to conscience; for health is the second blessing that we mortals are capable of, a blessing money can't buy.

—Jackie Mason

It's no longer a question of staying healthy. It's a question of finding a sickness you like.

—Jackie Mason

The advantage of a classical education is that it enables you to despise the wealth that it prevents you from achieving.

—Russell Green

Freedom of the press is limited to those who own one.

—A. J. Liebling

Art for art's sake is a philosophy of the well-fed.

—Frank Lloyd Wright

No one can earn a million dollars honestly.

—William Jennings Bryan

The United States Congress, like a lot of rich people, lives in two houses.

—John Green