In Hollywood a marriage is a success if it outlasts milk.
—Rita Rudner
A celebrity is a person who works hard all his life to become well known, then wears dark glasses to avoid being recognized.
—Fred Allen
Here's a tip to avoid death by celebrity: First off, get a life. They can't touch you if you're out doing something interesting.
—Kent Nichols and Douglas Sarine
Behind the phony tinsel of Hollywood lies the real tinsel.
—Oscar Levant
The nice thing about being a celebrity is that when you bore people, they think it's their fault.
—Henry Kissinger