I figure when my husband comes home from work, if the kids are still alive, then I've done my job.

—Roseanne Barr

More about this quote

Tags:

life success survival kids

Permalink for this quote

About Roseanne Barr

Portrait of Roseanne Barr

Roseanne Cherrie Barr (born November 3, 1952) is an American actress, comedian, writer, and television producer. Barr began her career in stand-up comedy before gaining acclaim in the television sitcom Roseanne (1988–1997; 2018). She won an Emmy and a Golden Globe Award for Best Actress for her work on the show.

You may find more from Roseanne Barr on Wikiquote

More quotations from Roseanne Barr

My parents . . . decided early on that all of the problems in my family had somehow to do with me. All roads led to Roseyville, a messy, chaotic town where, as parents, they were required to visit, but could never get out of quick enough or find a decent parking place.

—Roseanne Barr

More about this quote

Permalink for this quote

Women should try to increase their size rather than decrease it, because I believe the bigger we are, the more space we'll take up, and the more we'll have to be reckoned with. I think every woman should be fat like me.

—Roseanne Barr

More about this quote

Tags:

power feminism weight fat

Permalink for this quote

More quotations tagged with “kids”

One thing kids like is to be tricked. For instance, I was going to take my little nephew to Disneyland, but instead I drove him to an old burned-out warehouse. "Oh, no," I said, "Disneyland burned down." He cried and cried, but I think that, deep down, he thought it was a pretty good joke. I started to drive over to the real Disneyland, but it was getting late.

More about this quote

Tags:

humor kids Disney

Permalink for this quote

Sometimes it seems as though not a moment has moved, but then you look up and you're already old or you already have a household of kids or you look down and see your feet are miles and miles away from the rest of you—and you realize you've grown up.

—Jacqueline Woodson in Between Madison and Palmetto

More about this quote

Tags:

time age growing up kids

Permalink for this quote

I don't think anyone ever remembers what they were really like as kids. Adults think they do, but they don't. Photos and videos don't capture the real you, or bring back to life the person you used to be. You have to return to the past to do that.

—Darren Shan in Sons of Destiny

More about this quote

Tags:

life memory past identity kids

Permalink for this quote

Kids are like buckets of disease that live in your house.

More about this quote

Tags:

health children disease illness kids

Permalink for this quote

Any kid will run any errand for you, if you ask at bedtime.

More about this quote

Tags:

work kids bedtime

Permalink for this quote