If God had wanted us to vote, he would have given us candidates.

politics God voting

About Jay Leno

Portrait of Jay Leno

James Douglas Muir Leno ( LEN-oh; born April 28, 1950) is an American television host, comedian, writer and actor. After doing stand-up comedy for years, Leno was chosen in 1992 to replace Johnny Carson as the host of NBC's The Tonight Show; Leno hosted The Tonight Show until September 2009...

More quotations from Jay Leno

There's this big pie in show business, and you physically can't eat the whole pie. If you give everybody a slice of pie, you will still have more than enough. The real trick is not to try to get the whole pie, but to keep the biggest slice.

I went into a McDonald's yesterday and said, 'I'd like some fries.' The girl at the counter said, 'Would you like some fries with that?

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach a man to fish and he will eat for a lifetime. Teach a man to create an artificial shortage of fish and he will eat steak.

Here's something to think about: How come you never see a headline like 'Psychic Wins Lottery'?

humor lottery psychics

The reason there are two senators for each state is so that one can be the designated driver.

More quotations tagged with “voting”

Politics is how you live your life, not whom you vote for.

politics life morality voting

I never vote for anyone; I always vote against.

—W. C. Fields

politics voting

Half of the American people have never read a newspaper. Half never voted for President. One hopes it is the same half.

news politics USA voting

Vote for the man who promises least; he'll be the least disappointing.

—Bernard Baruch

politics disappointment democracy voting

The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter.

—Winston Churchill

politics ignorance knowledge democracy voting