Facts are stubborn things, but statistics are more pliable.
—Mark Twain
There are three kinds of lies: lies, damned lies, and statistics.
—Benjamin Disraeli
I've done the calculation and your chances of winning the lottery are identical whether you play or not.
—Fran Lebowitz
A single death is a tragedy; a million deaths is a statistic.
—Joseph Stalin
Smoking is one of the leading causes of statistics.
—Fletcher Knebel
Statistician: A man who believes figures don't lie, but admits that under analysis some of them won't stand up either.
—Evan Esar
Statistics: The only science that enables different experts using the same figures to draw different conclusions.
—Evan Esar
Nearly one-half of all Americans are torsos.
—Demetri Martin