About George Carlin
George Denis Patrick Carlin (May 12, 1937 – June 22, 2008) was an American stand-up comedian, satirist, social critic, actor and author. Widely regarded as one of the greatest and most influential comedians of all time, he was known for his stand-up routines, combining elements of dark comedy and commentary...
More quotations from George Carlin
May the forces of evil become confused on the way to your house.
There's no present. There's only the immediate future and the recent past.
As a matter of principle, I never attend the first annual anything.
They call it the “American Dream” because you have to be asleep to believe it.
More quotations tagged with “irony”
A lifetime of happiness! No man alive could bear it: it would be hell on earth.
One thing you will probably remember well is any time you forgive and forget.
I believe that professional wrestling is clean and everything else in the world is fixed.
To punish me for my contempt for authority, fate made me an authority myself.
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