What I don't like about office Christmas parties is looking for a job the next day.

—Phyllis Diller

job Christmas drunkenness parties

About Phyllis Diller

Portrait of Phyllis Diller

Phyllis Ada Diller (née Driver; July 17, 1917 – August 20, 2012) was an American stand-up comedian, actress, author, musician and visual artist, noted for her eccentric stage persona, characterized by her self-deprecating humor, wild hair and clothes, and exaggerated, cackling laugh.

More quotations from Phyllis Diller

The reason women don't play football is because eleven of them would never wear the same outfit in public.

—Phyllis Diller

Burt Reynolds once asked me out. I was in his room.

—Phyllis Diller

We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve years telling them to sit down and shut up.

—Phyllis Diller

Always be nice to your children because they are the ones who will choose your rest home.

—Phyllis Diller

children old age dotage

A smile is a curve that sets everything straight.

—Phyllis Diller

happiness smiles curves lines

More quotations tagged with “Christmas”

Pets, like their owners, tend to expand a little over the Christmas period.

—Frances Wright

Maybe Christmas, the Grinch thought, doesn't come from a store.

Nothing says holidays, like a cheese log.

—Ellen DeGeneres

food cheese holidays Christmas

Please to put a nickel, please to put a dime. How petitions trickle in at Christmas time!

—Phyllis McGinley

money Christmas

Coming from Chicago, I like a white Christmas.

—Dennis Franz

snow Christmas Chicago

History

18 Dec 2014 Added