I gotta work out. I keep saying it all the time. I keep saying I gotta start working out. It's been about two months since I've worked out. And I just don't have the time. Which uh..is odd. Because I have the time to go out to dinner. And uh..and watch tv. And get a bone density test. And uh.. try to figure out what my phone number spells in words.
—Ellen DeGeneres
Nothing like a lot of exercise to make you realize you'd rather be lazy and dead sooner.
—Randy K. Milholland
I had to face the facts; I was pear-shaped. I was a bit depressed because I hate pears. Especially their shape.
—Charlotte Bingham
The first time I see a jogger smiling, I'll consider it.
—Joan Rivers
Adversity has the same effect on a man that severe training has on the pugilist: it reduces him to his fighting weight.
—Josh Billings
Under democracy one party always devotes its chief energies to trying to prove that the other party is unfit to rule - and both commonly succeed, and are right.
—H. L. Mencken
My doctors told me I would never walk again. My mother told me I would. I believed my mother.
—Olympic gold medalist Wilma Rudolph
I used to jog but the ice cubes kept falling out of my glass.
—David Lee Roth